Sunday 18 November 2018

day -44 pity

So i have been away for a long long time. My end semester exams are approaching. Lot of submissions, so i was plain busy. I am still not done with them but yes only two more to go. Anyways, so past few days have been busy plus full of stress. How is a personal jorunal meant to be? Am i to write everything here!?? If it is so then may be i should start doing it.
So there was this ex-roomate of mine, who was a friend once. I would rather not call her a friend because i never liked her much. You know how you get stuck into some unwanted friendships. Same thing happened here. I was stuck into it as i could not say it one her face that i did not like her at all. If she would have been a nicer person, it would have been easy. But no she was not - back biting, and one thing which i don’t get is some people’s problem with personal aggrandisement.
One day i got a chance and let it all out. I was glad of that because i got a chance to not to pretend anymore to like her.
All was done but becaue of some interaction we were forced to have, due to some group assignments, i was just stuck once again. Glad that is over too. Only one thing i ever want to say to her now is that ‘dude chill, everything is not about instagram and Facebook.’ Everything is not about putting up a show in front of people. Everything is not about begging people to like you. Everything is not about fake pictures, fake profiles. Everything should be about what is inside of you. You will not get peace by forcing people to like you and love you. You need to love yourself. I saw you, you were venomous about everyone, when you never liked them why did you try so hard to win their likeness. These things do not matter, what matters is satisfaction, which comes from inside and not by posting pictures online and telling people that you are so good.
Some times it really bothers me, some people’s craving for attention. Dude chill, relax!! Take a look at your life and try to be perfect inside out, and do not just try to appear perfect virtually or in crowds. By trying to isolate me, you are only isolating yourself.

Thats it! All i wanted to say. May be i am also letting out my anger only, may be i am wrong but that is how i felt. Plain and simple. The topic for me is over now. Enough time wasted on it. And now all i feel for her is little pity, which i know is wrong but i can not help it. Happy ending.

Other than that life is pretty simple. I need to go back to my routine, like, writing this blog and so much more. It is good to be back. Take care. I will see you tomorrow.i

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